TOP TEN WAYS YOU KNOW IT'S A REDNECK CHURCH:
10. Finding and returning lost sheep isn't just a parable.
9. The choir robes were donated by (and embroidered
with the logo from) Billy Bob's Barbecue.
8. They think 'rapture' is what you get when you
lift something too heavy.
7. The collection plates are hub caps from a '56 Chevy.
6. Opening day of deer season is recognized as an
official church holiday.
5. The choir is known as the 'O K Chorale'.
4. In a congregation of 500 members, there are only
seven last names in the church directory.
3. A member requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive
truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't
get out of."
2. The finance committee refuses to provide funds for the
purchase of a chandelier because none of the members
knows how to play one.
1. When the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help
take up the offering," five guys stand up.